The Moment I Thought I Had Gone Crazy

I will never forget the moment when I thought I had gone crazy.

I started spending most of my time walking in nature, meditating, and shaping my

offering to the world. But there was no proof yet that my gifts would be received by anybody.

I would write a blog post with a grand total of 2 readers, and later on, make a YouTube video with 3 views. Someone said to me: Why are you doing all this work? You have so few views, what’s the point?

Others told me: It is all nice and good that you have this dream. But you also need to be realistic, most people never achieve what they set out to do, so have your backup plan ready.

I was always quite good at keeping these voices at bay, being mindful that they were mere distractions. But I remember on a particular day really feeling that maybe they were right. Maybe I was just making all of this up in my own mind!

What if no one actually cares about my “deeper service” to this world?

What if I’m just coming up with crazy ideas in my own head thinking I can do this?

What if I’m just avoiding life, afraid to face “reality”?

These thoughts seemed very real to me, as my mind was quick to give me direct evidence: No one listens to or reads your stuff!

And that moment, as I understand it now, was the pressure point. It was the universe’s final test of saying: Do you really want this? Are you ready to trust without seeing? Are you prepared to take a step forward with full certainty even though anxiety is nearly crippling you from the inside?

To say that I felt ready would be a lie. 

To say that I was certain would be pushing it. 

But something inside me calmly said: Go. Continue. Trust. You are guided, and it will all fall into place.

I’m experiencing deep emotions as I write this.

Because eventually it clicked, with crystal clarity. And I will never forget the moment when I realized: I wasn’t crazy. There was always a point to the journey. And I was guided.

I want you to think about your life as it is at this moment. Maybe you are right in the middle of a journey where it hasn’t clicked yet, where you haven’t seen direct evidence that what you are doing is being guided, leading you to exactly where you need to be.

When your own mind tells you that you have gone mad, when people around you doubt you and don’t believe in your heart’s and soul’s vision, that is exactly what is meant to happen. 

That is your initiation. 

That is the moment the universe has its eyes on you and asks, my child, are you ready for this?

You don’t have to walk through that initiation alone. Trusting your vision gets easier when you are surrounded by people who see it too, and having direct support in your journey turns that trust into something you can actually act on.

If you’re ready to go deeper, click here to see my upcoming training courses or click here to access past recordings.